Figs People

Figs People
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Licence to Fill—the Indulgences of 007 Cuisine

‘Shaken, not stirred.
Not: steamed vegies with skinny latte. The tag line for fictional British agent James Bond’s Martini preference is a corny cocktail party ice-breaker. What most people may not know about Bond is that the man loves his food just as he loves his women. In the book Diamonds Are Forever, Bond tells love interest Tiffany Case that his idea of a girl is one who can make sauce béarnaise as well as love.
But what exactly does a man—who could die while saving the world—eat? And could the mere civilian indulge as Bond does and live to Die Another Day?

James Bond is a character created by Ian Fleming in 1953 and since then has lived adventures in 12 books, 2 short story collections and 23 films. The cool and collected killer saves the world and suaves his way through casinos with as much ease as he freefalls from tall buildings — about as close to a real-life superhero anyone can aspire to be.

Indeed, it’s far easier for mere mortals to order eggs Benedict, rather than break into a Soviet embassy or convert a lesbian to heterosexuality. That’s why Fleming wanted the reader to taste Bond’s life—if not through his blood and sweat— then through what he ate:
My contribution to the art of thriller-writing has been to attempt the total stimulation of the reader all the way through, even to his taste buds.
In one of many descriptions on dining, Fleming indulges the reader with the richness of Bond’s breakfast routine:

Sitting down to The Times, he breakfasts on two large cups of very strong coffee, from De Bry in New Oxford Street, brewed in an American Chemex and an egg served in a Dark Blue egg cup with a gold ring round the top, boiled for three and a third minutes. There is also wholewheat toast, Jersey butter and a choice of Tiptree ‘Little Scarlet’ strawberry jam, Cooper’s Vintage Oxford marmalade and Norwegian Heather Honey from Fortnum and Mason, served on blue Minton china. Breakfast is prepared by May, his Scottish housekeeper, whose friend supplies the speckled brown eggs from French Marans hens. [From, The James Bond Dossier website www.tjbd.co.uk]
As you can read, there’s more than just a little name-dropping, but Fleming didn’t receive any endorsements—this was before product placement took a grip on cinema with its lingering shots of Omega watches and BMW badges.

Why did Fleming make food and drink such a focus in his writing as much as the description of battle scars and the freak show of dastardly villains? Come on, if Bond ordered Caesar salad, hold-the-bacon-mayonnaise-and-croutons, would any woman want to jump into bed with his no-carb abs? A man’s man is a meat fiend, a connoisseur of the dangerous and rare. Willing to risk the ire of caviar protectionists worldwide, he tosses beluga-covered blini into his mouth with about as much guilt shown after tucking his Walther PPK back in its holster.

What do you think Bond’s favourite meal would be? Something grand, like smoked confit of venison with raspberry jus and truffle oil rosti, or would he be more into British ‘bangers ’n’ mash’? He’s a bit in the middle—simple, good-quality ingredients prepared with care, ‘just so’. There’s even a James Bond recipe by Fleming for the humble Scrambled eggs.

Throughout his travels around the world, Bond tastes the local cuisine as much as he samples the local women. When he’s with CIA counterpart Felix Leiter in the US, he eats Little Neck Clams and Fried Chicken Maryland. In France it’s cold langoustine; in Italy, tagliatelle verde. Universal to anywhere, anytime, is the staple of oysters, beluga caviar, eggs (Benedict, en concotte, scrambled) and any array of grilled meat accompanied by potatoes.

Overall, Bond eats rather well; a good balance of protein and carbs. He also eats fruit, such as fresh figs, strawberries and pineapple. His aversion to cream-based sauces is from snobbery rather than health; he believes it masks the taste of poor quality meat. This is no man to eat donuts on a stakeout.
But the downfall in his lifestyle is alcohol, cigarettes and coffee. And not just because of the drugs laced in it as in Dr. No.
Drinking
By the time of Thunderball, (9th book) Bond’s daily intake of spirits is around half a bottle. And that doesn’t even count other drinks such as champagne of any mentioned brands: Dom Perignon, Bollinger, Taittinger, and Veuve Cliquot.
Fleming describes the role of drinking in 007’s life:

“Drink relaxed Bond. His only rule was not to get drunk, but perhaps for 20 years he had hardly gone to bed cold sober. His other rules were not to drink at midday or after dinner, and never to drink liqueurs.”

The ‘Atomic Martinis’ website calculated that Bond has had 431 drinks, with more than the standard Martini as his poison cocktail of choice; such as the Vesper, the Old-Fashioned, the Negroni and the Americano.
No wonder he had developed his own hangover cure of a ‘prairie oyster’ [egg yolk, Worcestershire sauce, Tabasco, vinegar and tomato sauce].

To stay awake for long stakeouts, Bond would drink coffee, usually some name-dropped straight black Jamaican blend. Despite being on her Maj’s secret service, tea was described by Fleming through Bond as the ‘flat, soft, time-wasting opium of the masses’.
Smoking
In the film version of You Only Live Twice, Bond uses a Q-branch secret weapon explosive cigarette to cause distraction long enough for him to sabotage the rocket launch. This wasn’t the only danger of cigarettes; Bond would smoke 60 a day of custom-made special Balkan and Turkish mixture with three gold bands on the filter.

If we civilians were to live the same lifestyle—except without skiing Swiss slopes and swimming with sharks—surely our livers would be pickled, and our lungs spluttering in an overdose of smoke. The rich butter-based seafood dishes would result in fat-clogged arteries, though the favourite ingredient of eggs may counteract this.
However, having a licence to kill means you live each day as your last. Sure, his liver and heart are likely to have a short countdown like an impending nuclear explosion at Fort Knox, but Bond needs the energy to fight off assassins, seduce ladies, and chase bad guys. He’s fiction. In real life he’d be a pudgy, spluttering alcoholic with poor blood circulation.

But as Bond said in You Only Live Twice:
I shall not waste my days trying to prolong them; I shall use my time…

So one night as James Bond won’t hurt.
Just don’t cook it yourself, as the man himself recommends: [website: The Commander’s Club]

Show no knowledge of how food is actually prepared. You have never cooked a meal in your life. What you eat is provided either by the Scottish treasure who keep house for you or by a girl or by a restaurant. In your world, a meal appears, is devoured and vanishes.

James Bond Menu

The Vesper
Stonecrabs and melted butter
James Bond Scrambled Eggs
Green figs

/////The Vesper///////
This cocktail was devised by Bond in honour of Vesper Lynd, the double agent love interest in Casino Royale. Bond states that he named the drink ‘The Vesper’, because once he tasted it, it was all he wanted to drink.

“A dry martini,” [Bond] said. “One. In a deep champagne goblet.”
“Oui, monsieur.”
“Just a moment. Three measures of Gordon’s, one of vodka, half a measure of Kina Lillet. Shake it very well until it’s ice-cold, then add a large thin slice of lemon peel. Got it?”
“Certainly, monsieur.” The barman seemed pleased with the idea.
-Ian Fleming, Casino Royale

NOTES:
• Kina Lillet is no longer available. Use Lillet Blonde instead or Dry Vermouth with a dash of bitters.
• For the more hardcore authentic drink, use 100 proof Vodka—as per 1953 standards.
• Use a champagne goblet—not a martini glass.

/////Stone Crabs/////
Bond ate stone crabs while dining with gluttonous businessman Mr Du Pont in Goldfinger.
The meat of the stonecrabs was the tenderest, sweetest shellfish he had ever tasted. It was perfectly set off by the dry toast and the slightly burned taste of the melted butter. The champagne seemed to have the faintest scent of strawberries. It was ice-cold. After each helping of crab, the champagne cleaned the palate for the next. They ate steadily and with absorption and hardly exchanged a word until the dish was cleared.
Steamed Stone Crab Claws with Melted Butter [From Saveur.com]
SERVES 4
Stone crab claws—the only part of the shellfish that’s eaten—are usually served chilled, but they’re still quite tasty when steamed and eaten with a little melted butter, like lobster.
1/2 stick (4 tbsp.) butter
32 large stone crab claws, chilled
1 lemon, cut into wedges
1. Put uncracked claws into a steamer basket and set over steamer pot of boiling water over high heat. Cover and steam until heated through, about 5 minutes.
2. In the meantime, melt butter in a small pan, being careful not to brown it. Remove from heat. Transfer to small serving bowl.
3. Remove claws from steamer, crack shells, and serve with melted butter and lemon wedges.
This recipe was first published in Saveur in Issue #57

//////Green Figs with Yoghurt//////
When visiting Turkey, Bond knew which foods were as tantalising as the exotic belly dancers. He eats figs at ally Darko Kerim Bey’s Station T, in From Russia With Love:
“The yoghourt, in a blue china bowl, was deep yellow and with the consistency of thick cream. The green figs, ready peeled, were bursting with ripeness, and the Turkish coffee was jet black and with the burned taste that showed it had been freshly ground”.

Green Figs Stewed in Honey with Vanilla, Lemon Zest and Thyme [From http://www.spicelines.com]
To serve two
Ingredients:
2 tablespoons honey
1 tablespoon water
1 6-inch vanilla bean (I prefer Mexican)
2 or 3 strips of lemon zest
1 sprig of lemon thyme (or any other thyme)
8 ounces fresh Calimyrna or other green-skinned figs

Method:
1. Rinse the figs and pinch off the stems. Cut them in half and set aside.
2. Split the vanilla bean in half lengthwise and cut each half into 2 or 3 pieces.
3. In a small saucepan, combine the honey, water, vanilla bean and lemon zest over the lowest flame. Stir to dissolve the honey and turn off the heat. Add the figs, gently toss them in the honey mixture, and let them macerate, covered, for an hour.
4. After an hour, add the lemon thyme. Turn the heat to very low and gently simmer the figs for 30 to 40 minutes, turning them carefully so that they don’t fall apart but are just cooked through. Remove the pan from the heat and let them cool to room temperature.
5. You can eat the figs now if you like, but they are even better if you leave them overnight to soak up the syrupy vanilla and lemon-infused juices they have exuded. To serve, divide the figs between two bowls and spoon their pale pink syrup over them. Serve with Greek yoghurt, of course, and coffee. Very black.

///James Bond Scrambled Eggs//////
Described in Fleming’s Thrilling Cities

. . . The Edwardian Room at The Plaza, a corner table. They didn’t know him there, but he knew he could get what he wanted to eat – not like Chambord or Pavillon with their irritating Wine and Foodsmanship and, in the case of the latter, the miasma of a hundred different women’s scents to confound your palate. He would have one more dry martini at the table, then smoked salmon and the particular scrambled eggs he had once (Felix Leiter knew the head-waiter) instructed them how to make:

For four individualists:
12 fresh eggs
Salt and pepper
5-6 oz. of fresh butter.

Break the eggs into a bowl. Beat thoroughly with a fork and season well. In a small copper (or heavy bottomed saucepan) melt four oz. of the butter. When melted, pour in the eggs and cook over a very low heat, whisking continuously with a small egg whisk.
While the eggs are slightly more moist than you would wish for eating, remove the pan from heat, add rest of butter and continue whisking for half a minute, adding the while finely chopped chives or fines herbes. Serve on hot buttered toast in individual copper dishes (for appearance only) with pink champagne (Taittinger) and low music.

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Can anyone tell me how to remove and preserve the seeds from figs?

Can anyone tell me how to remove the seeds so that I can save them? I want to use the seeds for a sugar scrub that I make. Some people use poppy seeds or strawberry seeds. They are great for exfoliating. Because I have this huge tree with a ton of figs I thought I could use the seeds. Also do you think I should let them dry out before I use them? I didn’t know if they might start to sprout if they were to remain moist. Thank you!

I haven’t removed fig seeds before but I know a technique that works on tomato seeds. Slice the fruit in half & scoop out the pulp, seeds and all. Place the pulp into a jar that has a lid. Fill the jar with water and as the product lightly ferments the seeds seperate from the pulp. With tomatoes the good seeds sink to the botom which allows the pulp to be scooped off the top. As for as planting goes they need to be dried in a cool place. I would also dry the fig seeds. I bet those would also ber good toasted & or cooked in a dessert.

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